I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
he shaved USA in his pubs
defrosting a beer in the microwave. no sparks so far.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
It is becoming increasingly more likely that my entire halloween costume will be entirely composed of borrowed clothing from the two girls I'm hooking up
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
Ah, drunk me ordered sushi at 3 a.m. for sober me's lunch the next day. EXCELLENT
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
Randomize
