i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus."
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
I just saw a fat chick ask the bartender to top her corona off with grenandine cuz she has a "sweet tooth" no that's diabetes fatty
Guess who won a bet and gets to name it Optimus prime if it's a boy
Nevermind. Totally worth it.
Was having a panic attack, but I'm out of xanax. Substituting with vodka shots and breathing exercises. My therapist will be proud, yes?
It's blow job season.
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
Randomize
