There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
There's a fat drunk walrus bitch here next to me and shes already puked and now falling on herself
OH FUCK NOW HER BOYFRIEND IS MAKING OUT WITH HER VOMIT HOLE
Sounds like a good blink 182 concert...
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni.
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Grandma keeps pulling a bottle of captain from her pocket and spiking people's drinks.. She just yelled "I'm DAMN HOT to be a grandma!" .. I LOVE HER.
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
Randomize
