Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
I woke up to find her cooking breakfast wearing nothing but my Nuggets jersey. I don't think this could end better.
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
where are you?
Hypothermia
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
She called his dick the colossus. I dont give a fuck if shes his wingman, I gotta see this natural wonder
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
ALSO I MAYBE ACCIDENTALLY HAND CUFFED MYSELF TO A CHAIR
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
My roommate randomally bought me two bags of pretzels. Worst "Sorry you can hear me fucking my boyfriend everynight" gift ever.
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
Randomize
