Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
He just walked up to me in the kitchen, pulled out his penis and stuck it in my sweatpants pocket.
It was probably cold. Sweatpants pockets are notoriously warm.
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
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