Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
The bartender cut me off so I peed in the corner. How no one noticed I have no idea.
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
I just overheard this sorority girl saying "It's like trick or treting but for alcohol and with no costumes." I'm jealous.
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
Like when your most normal sex dream is you being a prostitute, you know it's been one long ass dry spell.
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