KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
He told me that he wishes our relationship was more like prison: less touching, more butt sex.
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
i flashed his best friends last night
you always were good at making good first impressions
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
So that 100 days of sobriety thing I told you about last week? Lasted all of 4 days. Fuck it, life's too short
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
Randomize
