the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
Dude, I just spun my iPhone on my boner without it falling off. I belong in cirque du soleil.
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
I was unconscious Saturday for like 6 hours after I passed out on the sidewalks of our nation's capital. Thank you America, for bottomless brunch.
I can never have sex in Utah again. The altitude had me breathing like a fat kid going up stairs.
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
Randomize
