break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
My stomach is making the worst sounds, probably because there is nothing but semen in it.
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
There was a guy on the elevator dressed as santa in flip-flops giving away beer.
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
MY DINNER LAST NIGHT CONSISTED OF SEMEN AND A PROTEIN SHAKE... MY TRAINER WOULD BE PROUD I DIDN'T HAVE CARBS!
Randomize
