would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
I'm pretty sure you called me last night and screamed that she was force-feeding you a bagel.
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
Trust me, dating 38 and 20 year old dudes at the same time is the best. Money plus all of the sex. Finally figured out this relationship thing.
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
Randomize
