He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
She unfriended me on Facebook after I responded to her long love note with #demtittesdoe. Jager is the goddamned devil.
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
Randomize
