you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
I saw your relationship status and wanted to write "Now you can fuck with some peace of mind that she isn't giving that other guy she met online a handjob."
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
That awful moment when there is no more beer and you find yourself considering tequila and aloe juice.
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
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