she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
Being this Hungover on Easter has brought my closer to Jesus... I swear he had to feel shitty like this after coming back from the dead
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
I picked up the bartender so he could open the bar early and ended up with him giving me a ride home when he closed. I like snowdays and everything, but they get really expensive. Also, I think I threw up on his front door. Not checking.
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
Fell asleep naked on the recliner spooning with my organic chemistry book. The fact that I made it through four years of college is proof that the education system is fucked.
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
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