Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
I have a present for you
Like a legit gift, not just me showing up and getting naked
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
Randomize
