Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
Remember that dream I told you about where I shit out my own skeleton? I had it again last night.
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
Where are you? I just made a vodka + cranberry & I’m going to drive there & throw it in your face
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
You better be Eskimo Brother-ing the FUCK out of tonight right now. Long distance 'balls deep' high five
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
I just want to dump glitter on my floor and roll in it like a cat in catnip.
I just had to explain to an 70+ year old lady what 'coitus' was. This was not in my job description.
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
I'll be coming off of 7 days of not drinking. No horse tranqs either. I haven't been this sober since I was in the womb
Randomize
