it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
New discovery: conditioner is better for jerking off than baby oil. Fuck yes.
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
Remembering you have vodka in the freezer gives the same surge of happiness as finding 20 bucks in a coat pocket.
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
Randomize