Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
he drank half a bottle of bushmills, stood up to pee over the side, pissed his pants, sat in the puddle on the deck, told me my life goals were stupid and impossible, and wouldn't leave until 5am. by the time I got up at 8 I had 4 texts and 2 fb messages from him. AND HE STILL THINKS IT WENT WELL
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
Were not even through the second month of the year and I potentially may have torpedoed a marriage...
I see more hoeing in ur future
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