Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
I masturbated on the webcams with my bf yesterday then typed without washing my hands first... then my roommate used my laptop it was pretty priceless
Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
Giving me the bigger bowl of ramen isn't considered "romantic"
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
i'm not sure when it happened but apparently now it's topless bar night, im wearing a leotard and everyone is looking at me like i'm cheating.
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
I'm already too high to be publicly presentable. I just looked at myself in the mirror without my sunglasses. Debated contacts. Said aloud "But I'm nothing without my sunglasses."
You, me, naked, mistletoe, fifth of jack, gallon of lube, condoms, Cheetos, handcuffs, rope, along with no morals, inhibition or judgment. That's all I want for Christmas.
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
Randomize
