If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
I just got a standing ovation when i made it to work on New Years Day. good thing?
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
I told the DJ last night to play Third Eye Blind before 1:45 and just pointed at him as I walked away. He didn't do it and at 1:45 I just walked out pointing at him, without my friends
I just puked on the sidewalk. At 11am. Thought you'd like to know.
Just found out I lit my hair on fire last night.
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
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