so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
saw him outside... he got fatter, i got blonder. the winner is obvious.
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
Unless I'm getting a singing midget telegram, I'm not going to smile
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
Whatever. I just smoked another bowl so I don't care and wow I just noticed how fast my thumb moves when I text. I'm amazing.
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
We are all done wearing pants today
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
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