I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
As we were about to go at it, his roommates barged in singing jumper by third eye blind. Weirdest almost one night stand ever.
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
Randomize
