My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
Hahahaaa There's this one girl crying hysterically and wrapped around (i believe) her ex's leg. He's trying to shake her off without spilling his beer. This is fucking priceless.
My booty call fought through ice and a foot of snow to get here. He brought booze, food, and cigarettes for three days. My vagina is the greatest motivator of all time.
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
I gave myself a charlie horse masturbating this morning. I feel like that really set the tone for the day.
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
