you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
I've counted four places at work I need to get laid in. Come help me accomplish this.
Hey, I'm your guy
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
I'm the only person I know who could have actual sex and then dream about my vibrator.
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
I am convinced you could sleep through the apocalypse and only wake up because youre hungry & want Dominoes
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
Randomize
