Every time we have sex I can't stop thinking about Jesus
I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
My mom gave me a high five when I told her I was just using him for sex
You and your mom would make an amazing tag team
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
Your cock deserves a montage
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
I sang him a lovely rendition of 'So Long and Thanks For All the Fish", but replaced fish with dick.
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
Randomize
