She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
I'm waiting at the bar and am surrounded by unattractive women.
You need to get here and rebalance this disturbance in the force.
Pretty sure I picked a cat up off the street and took him home with me, fed him tuna, then let him go
Last time Jon threw a party I woke up on my porch, no shirt but 4 bras on, and "make better life choices" written on my stomach in sharpie
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize
