i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out.
i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
It's like God knew that was my ex's best friend and punished me. I've never vomited that much in my life.
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
