No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
you didnt have any toilet paper so I just took a shower
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
I've made friends with the guy dressed as a gorilla that was chasing the guy dressed as a banana around with a super soaker full of vodka. I feel this will be a good relationship for me.
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
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