Fine. I'll sleep in my office
Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
Yeah but then he looked at me bleeding on the floor, said oh i guess you need to go to the hospital now, and left
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
Im sorry you'll never get the feeling of closeness when you go to pee outside and you realize you're peeing right where someone else just peed
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
Randomize
