considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
She tied me up with her honor cords...
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
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