My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
If you don't answer the phone then I will be forced to leave you a wonderful voicemail of me throwing up
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
The cop told us he we helped him pass his monthly bong quota. He almost ran out of room on the hood of his car..
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
