At least make sure they are 18
Why
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
Just asked my dog if he was proud of me for making it home. That drunk.
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
He did plead exhaustion. And I made him push through it. I am like the motherfucking badass football coach of sex.
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
He said his parents were apparently coming over to surprise him with breakfast and I’ve never gotten dressed and run out of the door that quickly. I have commitment issues.
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
Randomize
