the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
were you wearing a green and blue thong last night?
yes! wait why?
because i found it in my pocket this morning...
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
Please tell me that SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE, has created a drink called a 'Tequila Mockingbird'. PLEASE.
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
We are all done wearing pants today
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
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