I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
It's like a toaster oven for my penis
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
I just had a flashback to us shaking up Gatorade mix and then inhaling it in your kitchen because it was funny. Now I can't stop laughing in work because that is the stupidest shit.
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
Dry spell is over and now I’m drowning in a river of dick. The dam broke and now half the dicks in DC are trying get in my skirt
It’s a glorious dick miracle!
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
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