I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
I put you to bed and you would not go unless I let you sleep with the vodka
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
I'm at the store buying a new phone cause I pissed all over mine last night. Drunk me is expensive as shit.
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
Randomize
