I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
he was in the bathroom singing "will it floooaaat?? will it floooaaat?!" turns out that's a deal breaker for me.
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
Hmm. I hear gunshots, car horns blaring, hear drunk white people screaming, and see about fifty status updates pertaining to the hawks. I guess they won.
Seriously... There's something wrong here. I'm drinking vodka to mask the smell of chocolate on my breath before I get home and he finds out. I fucking hate couple dieting...
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
Speeding home on my break at work because I forgot to grab my Percocets that I have because getting through work sober's too hard
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
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