can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
There's a big bag of salt and vinegar chips and a Budweiser for when you wake up. Don't say I never did anything for you.
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
Randomize
