He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
I told her I was team Edward. I haven't gotten laid that easy since I told your sister that I had cancer
Oh and apparently TSA has to open your present from my family or the terrorists win
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Randomize
