i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
Urine might work for jellyfish stings, but we found out it doesn't work well for nose bleeds...
i woke up to the sound of my dad getting blown. this is my life
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
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