I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
Somehow I've got the party rigged to where I get a foot massage every time someone wants a beer out of the fridge. Hellz yeah
That moment when the line ‘If you want a hot body you better work bitch’ in Britney Spears’ new song comes on as you’re using two forks to shovel enchilada into your mouth.
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
the weird part wasn't waking up in someone else's underwear, it was how the cat was staring at me like he knew more about last night then i remembered.
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