yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
I just saw an old lady yelling at a dead pigeon for leaving the oven on.
I am actually insulted by the long string of ugly, fat girls he hooked up with after me.
Either I'm drunk or judge Judy has 3D commercials...so I think I'm drunk. Also I may or may not haven eaten a hoagie on the toilet when I didn't want to stand up
So....I just took a paddle fan on high speed to the side of the head while getting head...still finished the job, good thing I'm drunk and couldn't feel it.
you started shaking the frozen steak while screaming "THIS IS CAPITALISM" before rubbing it all over your chest and passing out on your dog
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
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