things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
i told him that if he starts being sappy its friends = off. he called me jerkface and drew on me w permanent marker. im either in love w him or we are twelve.
i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
We both fell asleep mid-handjob and he continued to call it "handjob halftime".
I'm laying in bed cuddling with my teddy bear and eating waffles. I need a fucking boyfriend
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
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