Not a fireman, but good enough for last night.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
Why did I wake up with condoms on all my fingers?
Considering the girl you hooked up with, I'd be concerned about not having one on your penis.
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
The notary thing was a good idea. I can charge $2 per signature. I'm currently being paid in beer.
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
No actually you're a pro. You puked on the cab ride, and managed to completely contain it in your purse. the cabbie was even impressed.
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
Randomize
