I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
Quick, to the slutcave!
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
he was like tryna hang and chat and I was like dude there's an iguana in this room
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
Randomize
