yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
Old men and throwing up are my life now.
I just found out that AAA will pick you up if you're drunk for free if you're a member. How did I not know about this?
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
Apparently you get kicked out of gay bars if they catch you putting the entire free condom bowl in your purse.
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
He got punched in the face, dropped his laptop down a flight of stairs, and broke his roommate's lava lamp, getting all the toxic lava goo everywhere. This is why we don't let him get drunk. And yet here we are.
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
dropping lines from Workaholics has slowly become my icebreaker when hitting on girls. who would have thought "lets get weird" would cause girls to actually get weird
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize