it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
Just saw a commercial for non alcoholic baileys cream. WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT?!
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
Woke up way too warm in the middle of a spooning sandwich. Was working up a rant about still not wanting a threesome. Then I realized the littlest spoon was the dog. Might need to break up anyway.
Randomize