he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper.
I asked if he wanted to come over and he said he was busy. Then I sent him a pic of me in the bath with the bottle of wine I already finished and all of a sudden he was free. Booty calls are too easy.
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
I am not saying having unprotected sex in my boss' pool was a good idea, I am just saying it wasn't my worst idea of the summer.
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
Waking up drunk is great, waking up drunk and hanging with your mom is even better.
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
Randomize
