I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
So I went to have a snack...can you please tell me why there's a condom in the hummus?
I almost got runover on the sidewalk by a car but wen it got closer it was a crackhead walking with the whole front of a car... bumper, lights and all... I love New York.
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
How did i get home and why am i wearing someone elses shorts?
1. Not sure how 2. You showed up naked, we had to dress you.
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
Randomize
