Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
Can I crash on your couch? I just came home to find my wife giving two guys blowjobs.
Two?
Two.
Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
I'm seriously gonna die surrounded by a million cats and an unbroken hymen
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
The problem I'm having with looking for jobs while drunk is reading is really hard
You tell anyone I'm rocking out to Pitbull in an economy, base-model car, I'll kill you.
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
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