So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
I have the Everlasting Gobstopper of boners right now. It's kinda like a gift from god, but I don't want to spend anymore time with this girl than I have to.
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
What is the proper Father's Day protocol when you're sleeping with a guy who has kids?
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
My New Years resolution is actually to be MORE petty
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
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