do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
I just saw the nastiest chick.
Where?
woke up next to her... fuck you jack daniels, fuck you
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
You kept challenging people to a cartwheel contest...when someone finally agreed, you cartwheeled into some chicks face, then tried to propose to her as an apology. Fyi, she said no
okay i am so sorry that i pulled a knife on you last night but seriously that woman knows how to throw a party.
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Randomize
