the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
I bet you my entire life savings of $0 that there's a Doctor Who porn parody and that it features the sonic screwdriver being inserted into some cavities
Randomize
